Sunday, June 21, 2009

Famous Director to Make Stand Up Paddle Surf Zombie Movie.

SUNDAY JUNE 21: World famous zombie-film-maker George A. Romero has come out of retirement citing the emergence of Stand Up Paddling as “A Zombie Movie opportunity too good to refuse.”

Romero – best known for Dawn of the Dead (1978), Day of the Dead (1985) and Night of the Living Dead (1990) – says the SUP phenomenon will “give a fresh dimension to the whole Zombie genre.”

“The script is fleshing out nicely – it's based on the premise that some surfers became obsessed with unlocking the secrets of a mythical 'core strength' formula that would somehow give them 'watermanly' powers,” says the 69-year-old Director.

“As with all good Zombie films, it starts out innocently enough, with healthy surfers adding the SUP to their quiver of surf alternatives, but things soon get toxic – what with that oddly symmetrical 'maybe-I'm-gonna-punch-out-a-shit-maybe-I'm-not' SUP stance, delusions of some hitherto undiscovered bloodline tracing back to The Duke, and the more 'gone' Zombies brazenly edging closer and closer into already crowded surf zones... clearly you've got the makings of a modern-day gore-fest on your hands.”

Romero's production company has been scouting locations and nominates Currumbin Alley on Queensland's Gold Coast as a site of interest for the as yet-un-named movie, with up to a hundred local SUP enthusiasts registering for work as background extras.

“In cinematic terms, the SUP surfer ticks the three boxes of your classic Zombie character” says Romero's Director of Photography, Alex Perkins. “One, they've got to move stiffly, slowly and relentlessly. Two, the consequences of being caught by one and joining their ranks must strike irrational fear into you. Three, there's got to be an element of hilarity in there.

“Watching a pack of freshly Zombified SUPs trying to bear down on a victim – with their ten-metre turning circles, constantly falling off and getting up again, and their veering off to one side and constantly over-correcting – its gonna be Zombie-horror-comedy gold.”

“They exhibit every hallmark of Zombie social behaviour – gestating in canals and waterways like so many rats before taking to the open ocean.”

Director Romero agrees – “To be honest, I thought the zombie genre was dead and buried, but the moment I laid eyes on SUPs in action, I knew this was a zombie story that needed to be told.”

“Mind you, I had a go on one recently and it's a lot of fun on the flat days” said Romero, as he edged closer to your reporter.