Sunday, July 19, 2009

Brazilian Surfers Annoyed By Travelling Aussies.

By Guest Gold
miner Nick Carroll

Surfers at Guaruja, one of Brazil's most popular surfing areas, today expressed their annoyance and irritation at what they claim is offensive surfing behaviour by packs of travelling Australians.

"It's just too much," said local identity Luiz Resende. "They come over here with their attitudes, paddle out in groups of up to four or five at a time, and start catching waves like they own the joint."

Additionally, according to Resende, the Australians "keep yelling out to each other in their coarse, barely understandable English - something we, as native Portuguese speakers, find almost unbearably irritating."

Australians have become known among surfers worldwide for their constant travelling, often booking out entire boats in the Mentawai Islands in Sumatra and showing up as groups at well-known surf locations.

Surfers from other nations have often complained about the so-called "Aussies" and their apparently obnoxious behaviour, sometimes seemingly fuelled by excessive drugs and alcohol.

But, says Resende, the latest incursions at the renowned Guaruja beachbreaks - where top Brazilian surfers have been born and bred for generations - are beyond the pale. "Aussies just have no respect for our surfing culture, which has been built up for decades," he declared, while colleagues nodded in agreement.

"They think it's OK just to paddle out and start taking off on any wave they want. Then when we call 'em out, they pretend not to understand what we're saying to 'em."

The locals also said they were increasingly annoyed by Australians who used visa loopholes to extend their stays in Guaruja and other popular surfing areas, working in restaurants and bars and starting up businesses. "They think we want to eat at their 'barbecues' and attend lessons in how to play Rugby League football! Well, this is the land of grilled meats and World Cup soccer championships. I'm sorry, but there's nothing they can show us that we aren't already magnificent at.

"Of course, there is one thing we don't mind - they can bring their women over here any time they like. We hear those Aussie chicks will do anything."

Some Brazilian surfers said they had even been threatened with violence by Australians, who, they said, claimed to be experts in the feared Australian martial art, "biffo".

"We understand why Australians would want to leave their country - especially if it's full of other Australians," said Resende. "And we understand why they would want to come here, to God's country, where everything is pretty much perfect.

"All we're saying is - shut the fuck up, stop catching waves, and learn to speak Portuguese before you come here, or we will direct relentless amounts of covert hostility at you."


  1. ha ha ha g'day, the aussies you describe sound EXACTLY like the brazil boys out at "the bra" get over it... mate.

  2. I see what you did there. In general, I find all surfers to intorerable based on their relative characteristics, unless their value system is congruent to my own. Tow-bros, longboarders, SUPers, rippers, aussies, brazos, and yanks all draw my scorn. I would find surfering more enjoyable if most would just shut the feck up.

  3. This story seems to be upside down! I'm Brazilian and lived for a wile at the Gold Coast. During this time I saw many Brazilians that were very disrespectful with Aussie surfers and vice versa. Locals are the same everywhere, they want to protect their area and never like to see some one else riding their waves, especially from other countries, but, they always forget, particularly on tourists cities, that their economy highest income is generated trough their visitors. Well… that’s the way it works… I think this kind of things will never change!

  4. This is so funny...I'm Brazilian and lived in Oz for 6 years. I used to see the same behaviour from my country fellows when I used to live in Oz. Now I live in Sao Paulo and surf in Guaruja and Maresias every weekend and I never met a aussie down here. It's very uncommom. Anyway, this story is the same story I've heard about us during my 6 years in Oz. It's has just changed the location and the nationality of people involoved. I believe that us, surfers, are pretty much the same. No matter which nationality, we are very protective and full of prejudice. The same happens here locally if you are from sao paulo but surfing in rio. People are full of shit. This is a greater deal. In general, foreigners are very welcome here. specialy if you come from Oz.

  5. The irony is obviously lost on you Brazos. You all are noted for this phenomenon worldwide. Your species is also stereotyped for its complete lack of manners in the lineup and abusiveness towards women which stems your outrageously small penises.

  6. Ha ha, too funny. What makes it even funnier are some of these comments....

  7. I spent about 2 years in Brasil and 8 in Australia - my wife's brazilian, I love Brazil and its people. Brasil has better meat and definitely better looking women but.... surfing "culture" in Brasil??? Traveling in big groups, not speaking the local language, extending visas, working shit jobs and making a-lot of noise - cara, voce ta falando sobre os brasilieros e nao os Australianos! (you're describing brazilians)

    By the way I'm from Israel so we are even worst in the water - I think it's because we don't have enough waves and we get too excited and greedy. Not me though :) I'm always on the least crowded peek.

  8. Hey boys calm down. For starters if you travelled enough in life you know that everywhere you go it's the same bullshit!!! Waves = Crowd= Selfish bad behaviours (i.e. Narrabeen-NSW)
    I would also like to respond to the small penis comment... Have you had a Brazilian before???? I believe not, I agree they are a bunch of male sluts, however size has never been a problem and compared to the general Australian (my bf is an exception) they actually know what to do with their penis... You should try and find a Brazilian to score some "what to do with my penis" class!!!!


  9. gra, you think you're being clever, but the 'irony' is that it's true-ozzies are the new brazis; pack traveling, flag waving, wave claiming, obnoxios loudmouths, traveling the world like yobbos on schoolies week. good on ya, mates....doin ya cuntry proud.

  10. dear Seppo,

    I resent that comment. We are NOT being clever.

  11. Honestly Benjamin you are seriously a dik head.
    Brasilians are the friendliest people I have ever met. Much more than Australians.
    They are proud of their country as are Australians.
    Grow up. Everyone needs to learn to respect whatever country they are in. ESPECIALLY if they have booked and paid for a holiday in another country! Why travel if you aren't willing to learn and respect other peoples cultures. You disgust me.

    Small penises? I think you are mistaken and had sex with men from other countries.

  12. I am australian and i hate dumb, patriotic, yobbo, loudmouth aussies waving flags saying and acting like we are the best etc... i wish these type of aussies would get a clue and stop being such a bunch of know-it-alls. You are giving us a bad name!!! On the other hand i have noticed that alot, not all, Brasilians have no etiquette in the water. They surf in packs, snake and drop in alot. They are super friendly, respectful people( as i have seen while traveling in sth america) but for some reason they dont show it in the surf. I really like brasilian people but I would way rather surf with 30 australians in the water then surf with a pack of 10 or 20 least we are more orderly and dont blatently snake and drop in. (most of the time) And yes it discusts me and makes me cringe when i see australians acting like complete dickheads overseas. Brasilians are welcome to come and surf in oz as long as they respect the unwritten laws of surfing...dont snake and drop in...its simple

  13. I just hope this aussies dont come to Rio de Janeiro with the same atitude,because here in Rio things are alot different than what you see in São Paulo .Here in Rio alot of the surfers practice jiu jitsu andif you provoke you will get your ass beat up, but if you come with a cool attitude, no problem, there´s wave for everyone.

  14. yeah i guess both aussies and brazzos have good and bad points, really everyone just needs to be respectful of everyone, and i guess as now the whole world surfs its really hard to accomodate everyone

  15. some people commenting here have a penis fetish.

  16. Enjoyed that. I don't think anyone has picked up that this is a piss-take article.

    Does change your perspective however when you see it from the other point of view.

    In my experience (Aussie, living in Latin America for 5 years), Brazzo's are super cool people out of the water however the stereotype re hassling and big groups is true unfortunately.

    However, we traveling Aussies are definitely not innocent and can be just as aggressive in a more individualistic manner.

  17. How about stop calling us Brazzo's, honky pecker wood.